Guest Blog by Laranda Alexander
Do you question your worth, God’s love for you, or compare yourself unfavorably to others? Are you a burden bearer, perfectionist, or struggle with codependency? Are you often overwhelmed, stressed, or “not enough”?
Most women can be nurturing to others but neglect to show the same care for themselves. They can demonstrate much empathy and compassion to the people in their lives yet berate and even hate themselves.
Despite the abundance of resources available to support women's mental health, stress and anxiety levels among women are on the rise. Many find it difficult to ask for and receive the help they need.
Care for Your Heart: A Personal Plan of Care for Healing Emotional Wounds is designed to help you find balance, manage stress, decrease anxiety and depression, heal emotional wounds, gain self-acceptance and confidence, and find peace in your daily life.
This book will help you examine your heart closely and develop a plan to give it the love and care it needs.
Realize that you are not alone; God is with you, and the power of His love can heal your heart and lead you to a path of compassion, empathy, truth, and grace.
My Story
I remember the love and joy I felt when I first accepted Jesus as my savior and how I thought I could never lose those feelings. But over the years, I think I lost the natural wonder and amazement of God’s love.
At times, I had difficulty sensing His love for me, like while being bullied in school, suffering a miscarriage, going through divorce and bankruptcy, etc.
As an adult in my 30s, I found myself struggling with depression and anxiety; I searched for answers to help myself. I had worked in mental health nursing and ministry, but all that knowledge didn’t really help me. So, I went looking for answers to bridge the gap between my belief in Jesus and my medical/mental health training.
I found some answers that brought healing and changed my life, and I started teaching women what I had learned. Still, then I was diagnosed with hypertrophic cardiomyopathy (a genetic heart defect). One of the doctors said, “You know there are a lot of cases of sudden death with this.”
I was 40 years old—that was over 20 years ago—with a 5-year-old son and a 15-year-old daughter, and I had just been told I could die at any time without warning. If God really loved me, why would He let me go through this or any of those other hard times? I was filled with fear and anxiety.
While working in cardiology and mental health nursing, I was taught that decreasing stress, healing from past wounds, dealing with emotions, and walking in forgiveness was good for your heart. Considering the severity of my diagnosis, why was it so hard to give my heart what it needed? How was I going to care for my heart? What did God want me to learn from this struggle?
Through this trial (perhaps because of it), I have come to know God’s love more deeply and found that His love is healing to me. It makes a difference in my life, and connecting with it is what I need to bring healing to my heart.
What is Your Story?
How do you care for your heart? How do you know if your heart is wounded? Here are a few questions to consider:
Do you often feel sad and hopeless?
Do you have a poor self-image or feel like you are not enough?
Do you believe you are unlovable, insignificant, and worthless?
Do you have compulsive behavior problems or addictions?
Do you have irrational fears or phobias?
Do you have a short temper?
Do you have a history of destructive relationships?
Do you worry about the future?
Do you feel guilt or shame when thinking about your past?
Do you place high importance on other people’s opinions of you?
Do you think everyone is out to get you?
Do you sometimes feel you can do nothing right or are incapable?
Do you feel you have to be perfect to succeed?
Think back over your life at things that may have left you wounded or things you did or didn’t do that are affecting you now. When you were hurt, you may have unconsciously reacted to protect your heart by:
Turning the pain inward and beating yourself up.
Turning the pain outward, blaming others.
Developing addictions (food, alcohol, overworking, overmedicating).
Becoming codependent (having an unhealthy attachment to another, often controlling or manipulative person).
These attempts to feel better or numb your pain may have covered your woundedness for a time but ultimately led to more pain and regrets.
How You Can Care for Your Heart
Ezekiel 36:26 says, “And I will give you a new heart, and I will put a new spirit in you. I will take out your stony, stubborn heart and give you a tender, responsive heart.”
I used the acrostic RESPOND to help people remember what a responsive, cared-for heart looks like. Below is a brief description of what each letter represents.
Rested – Find calm from overwhelming feelings, worry, and anxiety. Know that you are valuable to God; he cares about your needs and will provide help.
Examined – Identify harmful beliefs and false stories you tell yourself. Replace them with truth as God reveals it to you.
Supported – Find supportive people and organizations. Rely on God’s loving presence to hold you up.
Prayerful: Recognize the power of prayer. Have frequent conversations with God in which you listen more than you talk.
Open – Carefully remove self-protective walls that hinder giving and receiving love. Keep your heart open through forgiveness and grieving losses.
Nurtured – Develop self-compassion, self-acceptance, and empathy for yourself and others. Think of yourself the way God thinks of you.
Determined – Trust in God’s steadfast love for you. Regardless of how complex your situation is, tune in to His love for you and extend it to others.
God can heal your broken heart and restore hope and belief that He cares for you, has your best interest at heart, and wants you to walk in fullness, peace, and joy. You can rest in the truth that God deeply loves you, and you have purpose and value.
Care for Your Heart
God healed my wounded heart, and now I help women care for their physical and emotional hearts. I write, speak, and do inner healing workshops to help women draw closer to God, gain freedom from harmful thinking, and find healing for their wounded hearts.
Care for Your Heart: A Personal Plan of Care for Your Heart will help you take a personal inventory and establish a care plan for your heart. Discover areas that may hinder you from receiving and expressing love, and find healing from negative thoughts, feelings, and past memories.
Responsive Heart books and healing events (www.responsiveheart.com) help women find a safe place to trust the Lord with their painful experiences and allow Him to heal their wounded hearts. Through this process, He reveals His perspective, compassion, and forgiveness. Amazingly, emotional wounds become a means to reconnect with the Lord and His love instead of a dead end.
Visit www.responsiveheart.com to arrange—or schedule to attend—a Responsive Heart Healing Workshop or event, to get more information, or to purchase Care for Your Heart: A Personal Plan of Care for Your Heart.
Join us LIVE on May 28, 2024, at 6:30 pm Mountain Time for this GREAT conversation on the Beacon of Light Podcast!
Comentários