Are you a victim of abuse? Do you need men to love Christ, but you feel like a Godless people are conspiring against society and sabotaging the success of the family? Do you have questions about helping boys to become men of Christ? Or, maybe you need some tools to help you? Well, look no further because this article will give you the secrets you need, without men having to be perfect. Best of all, these secrets will help boys to become men of Christ, but the biggest secret is that it starts at home.
Secret #1: Boys are children of God
All children born are children of God. The question is how and where do you teach that to boys? The answer is simple, the family. But simple answers are not always easy. If children know that they come from God that grounds them to know that someone is watching them, loving them, is aware of them, but more importantly, they are loved by Him.
All of us are born with a desire to know 1) who we are, 2) where we came from, and 3) where are we going. When children are empowered with this knowledge and encouraged to know it for themselves through finding God through prayer and scripture, they have a strength and a power that sets them on the foundation of Christ.
Look at the power of these words:
1. I am a child of God,
And he has sent me here,
Has given me an earthly home
With parents kind and dear.
Lead me, guide me, walk beside me,
Help me find the way.
Teach me all that I must do
To live with him someday.
2. I am a child of God,
And so my needs are great;
Help me to understand his words
Before it grows too late.
3. I am a child of God.
Rich blessings are in store;
If I but learn to do his will
I'll live with him once more.
This covers the three main questions that we are all seeking answers for. This is simple but it has to start young.
Secret #2: Boys Need to Know that God Loves Them
How do you know that God loves you? We are all born with the light of Christ. This light helps us to know right from wrong. This light also allows us to feel warmth, happiness, joy, and a feeling of love. Love ultimately comes from God and through our families, we need to allow that to be cultivated.
So, when you have a home that does not cultivate this, what can be done to help cultivate love? Society, schools, teachers, extended families, friends, churches, big brothers big sisters, groups can help. Love is fundamentally the crucial element to connect humanity to humanity because it comes from God. We have to share this knowledge. The light of Christ inside of the boys will resonate when they see that light from others. This is why we all need to be a beacon of light to others. This allows the love to be felt and know that it comes from God.
Secret #3: Boys Need Parameters
It's critical to remember when parameters are clearly set out boys will know what is expected of them. The key is to make sure that the line never moves. When mistakes happen, all children need to know that they are loved no matter the mistake. We have to hold children accountable for their actions. However, they will not be loved less. This also blends into Brene Bown’s work. I made a mistake, but I am NOT a mistake.
Secret #4: Boys Need Expectations
Here is what I mean. When boys have expectations, they know where the line is. They know what to rise up to, what to fight for, and what actions to take. This helps boys to know who they are and what they need to do because they can see clearly how to take action.
Think about it. Rules and commandments or expectations keep us all safe because it sets a standard by which we can measure. When we know what is expected then we know how to play to the game. In all of the sports, there are the rules that set the standard to know how score points, make a goal, know if the ball is a foul ball or out. The same holds try to if we know what is expected then we will be able to have success.
Secrets #5: Boys are protectors
What does it mean to teach boys, teens, and men to become the provider? It means to teach them that they have a responsibility to think about others (their family) and that they have needs. These needs are physical, financial, emotional, and spiritual. To provide for physical and financial means is the whole point of school, college, and or job training, right? They need to have skills in order to create or get a job that earns that provides for the physical and financial needs of the family
Children can learn this from a young age by starting with jobs around the house or outside of the home like babysitting, yard work, or dog walking earning a set pay. With that pay, they can then pay a tithe, pay themselves (save), and then give or get something. Simple lessons, but powerful impacts on how to be a provider. What will our words say and our actions say about what they earned, what they did with it, and did they think about the needs of others?
We can emphasize that providing is then taken to the next level where you begin to provide for your needs and wants. As those increase, we teach them that providing means to earn enough for food, clothing, shelter, utilities, insurances, savings, and good wholesome family fun. It is a responsibility. It is important to save for the rainy day but don't pinch “your pennies to death.” Providing is a key support in helping men to feel like men.
Secrets #6: Boys are providers
What does it mean to be a protector? Protecting them physically is a huge part of the equation. You are the first to get up to check things out. It is not about the capabilities if a woman can or can’t do that it is as a role and a strength for the family that they should do that. For guys, it is built in to protect things but especially protecting the family and siblings around them.
It is more than standing guard and keeping the "bad guy" away. This fierce protection or their hearts, minds, and their physical self. If someone is saying hurtful things to others, do you witness your children joining those saying the hurtful things, or do you see them protecting them? If someone is speaking badly about your wife or children do you stand with them or do you join in the ridicule? Standing for your family, loving on them not tearing them down or belittling them, or not throwing them under the bus for your gain or to show off to colleagues is critical to understanding how to protect others.
Secrets #7: Boys to Men come through Christ
One of my favorite scripture is found in the Book of Mormon:
12 And now, my sons, remember, remember that it is upon the rock of our Redeemer, who is Christ, the Son of God, that ye must build your foundation; that when the devil shall send forth his mighty winds, yea, his shafts in the whirlwind, yea, when all his hail and his mighty storm shall beat upon you, it shall have no power over you to drag you down to the gulf of misery and endless wo, because of the rock upon which ye are built, which is a sure foundation, a foundation whereon if men build they cannot fall.
This means when we are teaching our boys we must set them on the foundation of Christ.
Dads, look at how Christ spoke and talked to the children Matthew 18:2-5:
2 And Jesus called a little child unto him, and set him in the midst of them,
I implor all of us as a society to teach our boys to become men through Christ. Remember that is starts at home. It is simple, but it is not easy. We will find success as long as we work together to accomplish this.