Because I left Domestic Violence Blessing number 5, 421: Lack of Truth!
Lack of Truth Tellers is a Red Flag leading to Domestic Violence or Abuse.
Are you a woman who is dating? Would you like to know another Red Flag warning for someone that could be an abuser? It’s simple. Does your boyfriend, husband, partner, sweetheart lack truth-tellers? Everyone around him can only sing praises or never stands up to him? The Lack of Truth Tellers is a red flag leading to Domestic Violence/abuse. Why? Because no one is there to check him. No one!
Tip #1: Lack of Truth Tellers in their Life
Do you know what a truth-teller will do for you? They are that person who reaches out, pulls you back in, and has you come to Jesus when you have stepped out too far. They are needed in our lives to help us live our lives fully. If someone you are dating does not have this, start to question why.
Tip #2: They have no one to challenge them
The lack of Truth tellers means that no one is challenging them. No one is willing to stand up and say, “are you sure about that? Is this something you want to do? I don’t think it is a good idea. Or look, you are stepping out of line.” Our truth-tellers give us course correction, and for someone who wants control of the situation, this is the last thing they are willing to give up.
Tip #3: They surround themselves with all the right people
It’s critical to remember who they surround themselves with while you are dating that person. If the person you are dating has the perfect (ah, there is that word again) friends where no one corrects them or wants them to get upset, and they allow him to say things, take action against others, degrade people, run them down, they are working from a place of lack. The lack of an abundance mindset and the lack of truth-tellers.
Tip #4: If anyone contradicts them or threatens them, they remove them
Here’s what I mean. Have you ever been invited by him to attend a work function, a family get-together, or any social function and have found that when he starts to passively-aggressively talk about others, no one stops him? It’s possible the next time you get together s few people are not there, and you think, where is everyone? He will have all the correct answers or story to why that person is no longer there. It will be perfectly logical, and you will take the bait and go right along, or maybe after reading this, you will think--THIS is s RED FLAG, and you will distance yourself from them. (I hope it is the latter).
Tip #5: No one in his inner circle has seen the behavior you are describing
Finally, after a few months and possibly a few years of dating, your knight in shining armor has had a few of those “unexplained moments” in your relationship. You know the kind I mean. For example, did you have a drink thrown in your face in public or right before getting ready to go out? Have you received a smack to the head for wearing the wrong clothing or make-up or hairstyle? What about him degrading you over something you did to the point that it feels like you are looking at a completely different person.
When you share any of these with his friends, they look like a “deer in the headlights.” They can’t believe it. They usually respond with, “no way! They are so giving to the community. They are always on time. Or I’ve never seen anything like this before.” And suddenly, you feel that your integrity begins to be questioned.
This represents a summary of the warnings for women dating and what they need to understand when it comes to Lack of Truth Tellers as a red flag leading to Domestic Violence/abuse. With the consequences of ignoring this advice ranging from weeks, months, and years of wasted effort and putting yourself into danger, take the time to educate yourself on more Red Flag warnings about future abuse—your life might depend on it.
By the way, if you liked this article, you’ll LOVE this FREE Virtual Domestic Violence Conference in which we have talked about more Red Flag warnings about future abuse. It’s titled “Domestic Violence Conference UNTIE in LIGHT,” and you can grab it here: https://www.eventbrite.com/e/dv-awareness-and-action-event-unite-in-light-tickets-122544807819?aff=erelexpmlt
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